You can design a bolt like you referred in other software (hypermesh, lsprepost.)
However in the solidworks simulation you can only define a bolt like parameter. you can not choose nodes or faces, only edges.
My suggestion is , learn the result force on the bolts faces and manually calculate it (Stress=Force/ area)
split the bolt and apply forces like that article shows
or you can split the bolt and apply a temperature difference to create the preload (essentially what the bolt connector is doing)
i don't know if that is going to help your situation much, you're creating the same loading condition and your geometry/area of interest isn't changing and it sounds like it has elements that are getting torn, creating a singularity. but it is worth a shot. i have a feeling you're probably not going to get the resolution of the contact that you want which is going to create other issues for you and to minimize those effects would recommend going to nonlinear.