How do I do this? I've asked for the properties of the section, and I get a report that states the following:

Area = 2.993 inches^2

Centroid relative to sketch origin: ( inches )

X = -12.48

Y = -1.955

Centroid relative to part origin: ( inches )

X = 0

Y = -1.955

Z = 12.48

Moments of inertia of the area, at the centroid: ( inches ^ 4 )

Lxx = 142.7 Lxy = 0

Lyx = 0 Lyy = 139.8

Polar moment of inertia of the area, at the centroid = 142.7 inches ^ 4

Angle between principal axes and sketch axes = 90 degrees

Principal moments of inertia of the area, at the centroid: ( inches ^ 4 )

Mx = 0.5416

My = 142.2

This, however, is as far as Iv'e been able to get. How do I have SolidWorks display the spline as an equation? Is this even possible?

You can make a curve withe "equation driven curves". Tools - Sketch entities - equation driven curves.